Christmas came and went. We spent time with the family, taking comfort from each other, remembering all the Christmases past and the stories about Shelb that went with them. However,to our surprise, the hardest day was new years eve. We sat together on Shelby's bench, the rain easing long enough for us to be able to look out into the cold darkness from beneath our rain hoods. The lights from the homes below giving a strange kind of distant warmth. Holding hands, Dessie and I watched as the old year became the new. As the fireworks across Dorking spluttered and banged into life we had the innate feeling that we were leaving her behind. With every day that passes the hole that is in the centre of our hearts only gets bigger. Whoever said 'Time heals' was misled, as the only thing time does, is make what has happened in our lives this year feel more real!